Why do morons like lightning?
They think someone is taking their picture.
Why did it take the moron an hour to eat breakfast?
Because the orange juice carton instructions said Concentrate ! !
What do you do if a moron throws a grenade at you?
Pull the pin and throw it back at him.
How did the moron fall on the floor?
He tripped over the cordless phone.
How did the moron try to kill a bird?
He threw it off a mountain cliff !
Why did the moron climb the glass wall ?
To see what was on the other side!
How do you confuse a moron?
Put him in a round room and tell him to sit in one corner!
Hear about the moron that got an AM radio?
It took him a month to realize he could play it at night.
Why did the moron going to the airport turn around and go home?
Because he saw the sign that said "Airport Left".
Two morons were walking through the woods and they came to some tracks.
The first moron said "These look like deer tracks," and the other moron said, "No, they look like moose tracks." They argued and argued, and they were still arguing when the train hit them.
Why can't a moron dial 911?
He can't find the 11 on the phone!
How do you keep a moron in suspense?
I'll tell you tomorrow!